Are you missing speaking opportunities?
Success means public speaking, and public speaking amplifies your success.
If you are an executive, business owner or technical specialist, you will be required to step up into the world of public speaking as you achieve more. This can be board presentations, technical conferences, industry events, award ceremonies and media interviews.
It’s not most people’s favourite thing to do. In the list of worst fears, public speaking is number one – with the fear of death in third place! But this fear is mostly just a skills gap. When we’re untrained in public speaking then of course we hate to make mistakes in front of a crowd and be judged for it.
With good training and practice, we develop the skills to be able to make an acceptable speech. It still might not be your favourite thing to do, but you become competent.
But something may still hold you back from accepting speaking invitations. If you only do the absolute minimum speaking, then you will limit your success. People want to hear about your work, your insights and your journey.
I recently spoke to Catherine, who has a great career track record. She was very successful as a designer, then led a division in one of the world’s top companies in her field, and is now a sought-after business consultant in her industry. She is also a respected speaker.
Catherine was telling me about a speaking opportunity she had passed up. She was due to attend the biggest industry conference of the year. Three days beforehand she was asked if she would speak there too. It was a fabulous visibility for her personally and her consulting business.
She turned it down.
But not because she was afraid of public speaking. Her first reason was the short notice; she prefers two weeks to prepare. When we discussed it more, she had old speeches she could have tweaked. She also could have rearranged her schedule to practice.
She then said it was late in the day, not such a great speaking slot. But this reason didn’t hold up either. It was such a big conference she would still be talking to a substantial audience.
Eventually, we got to the real reason; the speaker before her was CEO of an international corporation. She thought she’d be a disappointment after such a prestigious speaker. In short, Catherine felt that she wasn’t good enough, interesting enough or prominent enough to warrant speaking there.
This is the self-sabotage that we often miss in speaking. It’s a subtle form of Imposter Syndrome – where you think you’d be a fraud if you spoke on a bigger stage than usual. The underlying belief is that you’re not good enough for that, and don’t deserve it. Like Catherine, you may have some good ‘reasons’ to refuse. But avoiding such opportunities limits your business or career success.
How can you get over this tendency?
First see it for what it really is. We’re taught from an early age that our worth depends on what we do. It instils a quiet fear of not being good enough, that is often unconscious. This creates a reluctance to make mistakes, which then holds us back from making bigger and bolder moves. Such as speaking at a huge conference with three days notice.
When you understand that this fear is not the real you, and the belief is a lie, you can choose a new belief. That if you make a mistake you can learn something, but your worth as a person will remain. It would mean nothing about you.
With this attitude, you will be more willing to step out of your comfort zone.
Secondly, be prepared. Always have a couple of good talks ready to go. Make one of these three personal stories and you now have talks people are eager to hear. Mark Twain is an excellent example of preparedness. He said “It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.”
When you’re successful and getting recognition, you’re already good enough. You have things to share that people want to hear.
If you can move past the negative beliefs and be prepared, then you’ll be ready and eager for your next big opportunity.
Tara Halliday, see profile