Drink and Imposter Syndrome

alcohol and imposter syndrome

Which of the two men pictured is more likely to be an alcoholic?

Is it the scruffy man in dirty clothes staggering along the street late at night? That’s certainly a stereotype.

However, a recent NHS report shows that adults in the highest 20% income bracket are more than twice as likely to drink heavily as adults in the lowest 20% income bracket. Maybe we should revise our image of the functional alcoholic?

For me, the intriguing question is why?

We can point to the prevalence of alcohol at social events, and the common practice of business meeting over drinks, with or without dinner. As you become more successful, you are involved in more such meetings, and your alcohol intake can creep higher without you noticing. A high alcohol intake becomes the norm.

Alcohol temporarily relaxes us too, and so tense meetings become more bearable with a couple of drinks. Maybe you have a drink or two when you come home from work, to take the edge off a difficult day. Or a difficult week.

Like the proverbial frog in a pan of hot water, who doesn’t notice or take action if the heat is increased slowly. He eventually boils to death.

We normalise what we do regularly and adapt to what our social environment holds as normal. It’s what makes humans so flexible and successful as a species. But it doesn’t always help us.

Heavy alcohol use is not just about physical relaxation; there’s also a strong emotional component. Alcohol neatly numbs our emotions. Not only do we feel less physically but we feel less emotionally too. It’s often used to help us ‘cope’ with stress and anxiety that otherwise would be overwhelming or debilitating.

Alcohol is one coping mechanism that people suffering from Imposter Syndrome turn to. Because Imposter Syndrome – the secret feeling of being a fraud and the fear of being found out – generates anxiety, stress and a sense of isolation. Imagining that we are a failure and that others simply haven’t noticed – yet.

Imposter Syndrome affects 70% of high achievers at some point in their lives. And that’s the ones who are aware of it. Those using a lot of alcohol might not even notice Imposter feelings, because they’re so effectively numbed by the drink.

The underlying belief with Imposter Syndrome is that we are not good enough, or worry that we aren’t. In a high-performance environment this means expectations and demands from ourselves and from others, and the threat of a fall if we fail.

Ironically, alcohol reduces our ability to perform at our best. It affects all our physiological systems for up to three days, our long-term health, and our ability to concentrate and make clear decisions. It also suppresses the alpha brain waves that are the hallmark of the coveted flow state – that peak performance state desired by athletes and business people alike.

Numbing ourselves to the Imposter feelings through alcohol is so common that it is one of the first questions I ask a new client; ‘What addictions do you have?’ And people are often startled by the question, having normalised their behaviour and embarrassed to admit dependency. But facing up to the idea that there is a very good reason why they drink heavily is an excellent first step.

When people feel more comfortable emotionally, as their Imposter feelings decrease, then the emotion-numbing pay-off of alcohol becomes less necessary. Suddenly alcohol becomes less attractive. Then the discomfort and reduced performance of the mild hangover is no longer worth it. People naturally start drinking less, or cut it out entirely.

Of course there are still issues of chemical dependency and the habit of reaching for a drink to be resolved. But when we start with why someone drinks heavily and remove that emotional ‘benefit’, then people naturally want to feel more comfortable by drinking less. Ultimately to be happier.

Tara Halliday

Tara Halliday, See Bio

 

Blog photo: evgeniyshkolenko/123RF